Never put LOVE off till tomorrow!

Not too long ago before I was happily married to my loving husband, I had a crush on someone without even knowing. This person was my friend, hell, my best friend. We would talk every day for hours on the phone, go shopping together, go ice skating, watch hockey games, you name it. Little did I know that I was falling for this person! In fact I did and still am.Yes this person is a she and yes my husband knows about her. She ruined almost all of my previous relationships. The funny thing is that I am no attracted to women in general but, just to her.  I’ve read a book called “Sexual Fluidity” and this book made me realize what I was going through. I was genuinely in love with her, not because she was a man or not because she was a woman but because she was my friend, a person and I fell for her innocently and unknowingly.

After High school graduation, she moved to the States and I remember having a hole in my heart. I became thin and sad. About a year later, in college I met Jordan. He was a nice guy and I really liked him. We started dating and less than 5 months, she was back in town visiting. I was so happy and excited to see her again that I totally forgot that I had a boyfriend. So yes, of course we broke up. Again, when she went back to the States, I was heartbroken all over again. This happened every year for 4 years.

I finished college and started working, I had to move so I didn’t see her for two years in those years is when I met my husband and I thank God for sending him to me. The next time I saw her, it was at my wedding. She was one of my bridesmaids. I don’t deny of still having feelings for her but if I put the feelings I have for her and the feelings I have for my husband in a balance, my husband wins.

I received an email from her. She was coming in town and wanted to meet with me. When I hear her voice, each and every time, I want to hear more of her. That’s when I decided to tell my husband. I didn’t know how he would react to all this, but I think he did more than good. He told me that I need to confront her with this, just tell her so that I can move on past this infatuation. And so I did.

I invited her to a restaurant, not too romantic and not too casual. I told her that I need to tell her something that she probably isn’t going to like. She was confused and yet intrigued. I told her everything and I told her about the book that made me realize what I went through. I was really expecting her to cuss at me or feel betrayed and disgusted but instead she told me that she felt the same way. We kissed…….

If any of us had the balls to tell each other what we felt, we would never have been in the bloody mess we are in now. I need some advice quick and fast. HELP!